I Never Want to Hear Jingle Bells Again: Thai Christmas

some of my wonderful English department co-workers

A Thai Christmas. No, this is not only me celebrating Christmas halfway across the world. It is classes being cancelled for half the day so that Thai children can "understand the culture around Christmas" (the head of my department's words). Thai Christmas was everything that Christmas is not: many competitions, singing Jingle Bells (NO other Christmas songs were explored), an hour straight of Gangnam Style, and slutty Santa outfits.

The day started out harmless. Some of my students wished me a Merry Christmas, I gave all of my classes the option of singing jingle bells at the beginning of class instead of playing a game. I even played Frosty the Snowman for one of my classes. The students were excited to get out of classes after lunch and my school even told me they were going to buy me lunch. How could Christmas with a bunch of people who have no idea what Christmas is except from Western consumerism go wrong?

plus of the day: I got a picture with 2 of my favorite
students, Tao and Om

At lunch time we were taken down to the courtyard and sat in chairs in front of a stage that had been elaborately decorated for the Christmas festivities. From what I understood, Alex, Matthias, and I were each going to judge one of three competitions: Jingle Bells singing, Christmas trivia, and the Santa and Santy dress-up/laughing. All of this sounded amazing and hilarious to me...mainly because I wanted to find out who this Santy character was. I was also really excited that the school was going into such an effort to celebrate a holiday that few people at the school celebrated...this celebration was mainly for Alex, Matthias and me. It was touching to think that the school was recognizing a holiday most people in it did not understand. This sentiment was short lived after I heard Jingle Bells for the 10th time. In the span of an hour. All accented in Thai, of course.

Me, Matthias and Alex in our Christmas attire

The Jingle Bells competition was ended with a beautiful rendition of "Silent Night" (accentless), which was absolutely ruined by someone screaming into the microphone in Thai. Then came the Christmas trivia, which consisted of questions I didn't even know the answer to and poor Matthias speaking unelievably slowly and repeating each question 6 times for an hour.

Then came the main event: the Santa and Santy contest. It seemed that the English teachers that actually celebrate the holiday were completely forgotten and the attention was focused on all that were participating in the competition (mainly because none of us were even asked to judge the competition). First came Santy--or shall we say Slutty Santa. For a culture that stares at people wearing tank tops in 100 degree weather and enforces teachers looking like pilgrims and students wearing uniforms that are extremely modest, you would think slutty costumes would be frowned upon. Oh Thailand, you proved us wrong again. One of my students was the first to step out in her tiny dress, impossibly high heels, and of course, Gangnam Style. Because what IS Christmas without Gangnam Style? NOTHING I TELL YOU, NOTHING. IT WAS PLAYING WHEN JESUS WAS BORN. Aside from my student, the procession also included store-bought, costumes, handmade costumes (out of plastic bags, what else), and a lady boy. The Santa competition was a bit less entertaining to say the least, mainly because we were sick of hearing Gangnam Style on repeat, of the Thai students pretending to be embarrassed to do the dance in front of their peers, and my lovely co-worker (really, she is the nicest lady), SCREAMING in Thai for an hour.

Lady Boy Santy

The day was exhausting, and I certainly came out of it with a great appreciation for my family who endured the whole extravaganza, and for what Christmas is really about: spending time with family and celebrating the birth of Jesus (I'm fairly certain most of my students don't know who Jesus is). I wish with all my heart that I could convey this to the Thais and attempt to explain the holiday spirit to them, but so much would get lost in translation and much offense would be had to the time and effort they put into practicing and preparing posters and stockings for the event. I will certainly never attempt to celebrate another person's holiday, especially without them telling me what it's all about.

tree, Rudolph, and Santa (and another Santa)

This post is fairly cynical, and I do sound like the Grinch talking about how terrible this holiday was because of how some Thai people ruined it, but I do have to admit this was an eye-opening experience, especially since Americans so easily stereotype people. It also helps me realize how consumerism does not only influence how people in America behave, but how people in other cultures view the people who feed into the traditions that consumerism brings along with it.. Not that I'm going to stop listening to Christmas carols, buying a tree, or shopping for my family over the holidays, but I now know what our obsession with Hallmark looks like from an outsider's perspective.